Chapter 1 – Comfortably Numb
Going to this party was not Corinne’s idea of a good time. Not tonight. Not the day after she had broken up with Kevin. Or did he break up with her? She was still foggy on that point. Maybe it was mutual. It had been a tumultuous six months together in what culminated in the ultimate demise of their relationship. It seemed like it was inevitable and yet it still hurt. It hurt like hell. And right now all Corinne wanted to do was drown her sorrows in a tall glass of something extremely alcoholic. Making her way towards the bar, she was glad she wasn’t driving tonight so she could get shit-faced.
“Corinne, is that you?” Nick appeared just as she was gulping down her Tom Collins.
Caught off guard, she started coughing uncontrollably and spilled some of her drink. Nick quickly grabbed some napkins from the bar and handed them to her, but he was trying hard not to laugh. The whole scene was comical.
“Sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you!”
Corinne’s face turned a bright shade of ruby as she dabbed at her mouth and the front of her dress in an attempt to restore her appearance, as well as her dignity.
“Oh, fuck it!” She threw down the napkins in exasperation. It was no use. Her dress was stained and she was embarrassed and humiliated. What a great way to top off another day she thought grimly. The one bright spot was that Nick Carter was standing in front of her. He always had a way of making things seem… well, better.
Nick couldn’t hold back any longer and burst out laughing. Corinne threw him a "I’m going to kill you” look, but she couldn’t help herself and she emit a nervous laugh. Their laughter lightened the mood considerably.
“I’m sorry. You just looked so ridiculous!” Nick teased.
“Thanks a lot, Carter.” Corinne tried to look serious, but was hopelessly failing. Nick always made her smile.
"You know I'm teasing." He leaned in towards her and said, "I'm really sorry about your dress. It is or was a beautiful dress." He hid a smile.
"It's okay. It's only silk." She replied sarcastically.
Nick smiled at her. "It’s good to see you.” He said sincerely.
“Thanks. You, too. I thought I might catch you here. It’s been awhile since I’ve seen you though— where’ve you been?”
“Oh, I was visiting my family in Florida. I’m back here now for a little while. You know, meetings and dreary BSB stuff.” He joked. “Hey, I didn’t expect to see you here. You usually stay away from these parties. Did you come with Kevin? I haven’t seen him.” Nick looked around.
Corinne shook her head. “No, sadly. I guess you haven’t talked to him.”
Nick shook his head. “No, not for a few weeks. What’s up?”
“We just broke up yesterday.”
"What?! What happened?" Nick looked shocked. He wasn't expecting that. He thought they were blissfully happy and was surprised that Kevin would let her go. He had admitted to Nick that she was the one. He half expected a proposal in the near future.
“Oh, Nick, I don’t know…” She sighed, her voice trailing off. “I don’t really want to talk about it right now if you don’t mind, but I’m sure Kevin will fill you in when you see him.”
When Nick still looked concerned, she added, “It’s cool though; we’re still friends— I think.”
“Corinne, I’m really sorry. I had no idea. If you ever need to talk, I’m here.” Nick looked truly sympathetic. He suspected something major must have happened to break them up so he was concerned. He had always liked Corinne and thought of her as a good friend. Nick put his arm around her and squeezed her gently and Corinne had to muster all the strength she had not to burst out crying. She would love nothing more than to cry on Nick’s shoulder right now, but this was his night and she didn’t want to spoil it for him.
She pulled away. “Thanks, Nick. I really appreciate that. I’ll let you know. Maybe if I get drunk enough, I’ll take you up on that offer.” Corinne looked down at her drink. “Well, this is not going to do it!” She laughed, holding up her practically empty glass.
“Here, let me get you another one.” Nick came back a minute later with a fresh Tom Collins in his hand and he handed it to her. “I promise not to make you spill your drink this time.” He smiled at her.
“Thank you! Much better.” Corinne took a sip. Ooh, strong, good!
Nick chuckled and took a swig of the beer he was holding. “So, what are you doing here?”
“Ah, yes. What am I doing here? Well, I wouldn’t normally be here as you pointed out, but my friend, Julia invited me. You may know her - Julia Sanders. Anyway, she’s the one who helped organize this shindig.” Nick nodded, taking another nip off his beer. “Plus, I was thinking about writing my next book about celebrities who get shallow awards so I thought I would do some research.” Corinne continued.
Nick looked at her trying to figure out if she was serious.
Corinne giggled. “You should see the look on your face! It’s priceless! Don’t worry, Nick, I’m just kidding about the book thing!”
Nick laughed. “Thank God. But, I have to admit, I’m kind of nervous…”
“You, Nick Carter, nervous about receiving one of the Sexiest Men of the Year awards? No! Say it ain't so!” Corinne was happy when she could get in a jab or two since he teased her mercilessly most of the time and it wasn’t often she had a good comeback.
Nick tried to hide his red-tinged face with his signature winning smile and another drink of his beer. “Well…” was all he could say, looking away with embarrassment.
“Seriously though, Nicky, congrats. You deserve all the accolades.”
“So are you saying I’m sexy then?” He was back to his old teasing self.
“Well, yeah, duh…” Nick cut her off with his lips; kissing her as an act of gratitude. Or was that it? Just gratitude? It must be the beer, he thought. It couldn’t be the fact that she looked breathtaking tonight in a figure-hugging royal blue silk dress that matched her eyes, revealed a generous amount of cleavage and accentuated her curvaceous hips and long legs. Her long light reddish-brown hair fell down her back in luxurious waves and framed her oval face perfectly. Her light make-up only enhanced her angelic facial features, not like some women he had seen who got over zealous with the eyeshadow, blush and lipstick only to end up looking clownish. Or the ones who were heavy-handed with the black eyeliner and dark eyeshadow to create the ever-popular “goth” look.
“Wow, Nick! What was that for?” The kiss was brief, but thank God the paparazzi weren’t nearby. She had no interest in being in People Magazine or in any magazine for that matter. She liked her anonymity, thank you very much. Corinne liked writing about other people; she didn’t like being the one being written about, let alone photographed. So, where the hell did the kiss come from? She wasn’t quite ready to admit to herself that she liked it, but she knew she did. It was the alcohol, definitely the alcohol. It wasn’t his dreamy blue eyes or his short, spiky highlighted-blonde locks or his enigmatic smile or the way his shirt opened to reveal a sexy chest with a hint of hair she wanted to run her hands through or the way his jeans clung to his lower body and were snug in the groin area... God, Corinne, stop it!
Nick shrugged and laughed uneasily. He really shouldn’t be putting the moves on Kevin’s ex
"I'm sorry, I don't know where that came from..." But before he could finish his sentence, Julia suddenly materialized.
“Rini, you made it! I’m so glad! Hi Nick!”
“Hey, Julia.” Julia was the assistant to the editor at People Magazine and she had spoken with Nick on a couple of occasions about his interview in People and the awards ceremony.
“I’m not interrupting anything, am I?”
“No!” Nick and Corinne said at the same time.
Julia looked at them suspiciously. “Rini, come and hang out with me. I have a few minutes to kill before I have to run around like a chicken with my head cut off. You don’t mind, do you, Nick?”
Nick shook his head.
“Enjoy your night, Nick. Maybe I’ll see you later.” Corinne said, not wanting to leave.
“Yeah, catch ya later.” Nick appeared casual, but he really wanted to spend more time with her; more time undressing her, to be precise.
“How are you doing?” Julia asked when they were a few feet away.
“I’m great. I’ve got Tom!” Corinne raised her glass and downed the rest of the liquid, reveling at her intoxicated state.
“You’re drunk already! Oh my God, why did I even invite you to this thing?!”
“No, I’m glad you did. I needed to get out, Jules. My apartment was suffocating me. The pictures, his music, his things… all reminders of Kevin…”
“When are you going to tell me what happened?” Julia confronted her.
Corinne shook her head. “Someday. Not now.” It was still too painful to talk about; too fresh. It did just happen yesterday after all.
“Well, you know I’m here if you need to talk.”
“Thanks. Funny, that’s the same thing Nick said to me and he also just gave me a kiss!”
“I thought you guys looked like two Cheshire cats when I approached you. Is there something going on between the two of you?”
“Well, I never thought so until now… maybe… I don’t know. I’m 9 years older than him.”
“Oh, you don’t fool me! You would love being the older woman and I’m sure he wouldn’t mind!”
Corinne laughed. “Yeah, probably, but he’s one of Kevin’s best friends. I don’t know…”
“That doesn’t usually stop you.”
“God, you make me sound terrible! That only happened once with Greg and Ryan 10 years ago. I really liked Ryan…”
“Besides, Kevin broke up with you, so you’re free as a bird now, right?” Julia continued, trolling for information.
“I’m not sure about that… maybe I broke up with him or it was mutual…”
“Rini, you should know that!”
“I know, I know.” Corinne said as they approached the h’ors oeuvres table. Corinne picked up a crab cake and popped it into her mouth.
“Yum, Jules! You outdid yourself with the caterer! Good job!”
“Thanks. Try the caviar.” Julia said and scooped up the nasty looking eggs with a spoon and put it in her mouth.
“Uh, no thanks. I’m always too chicken to try that!” They found a seat at one of the tables, amongst the many people milling around, making small talk.
“Hey, isn’t that Orlando Bloom over there?” Corinne tried to change the subject, wanting to get lost in her state of drunkenness. Orlando looked damn sexy, just like Nick...
“Forget about him. What is going on with you?! You and Kevin break up, you’re here at my party getting drunk off your ass and you’re thinking about sleeping with Nick! What’s next, screwing the rest of the Backstreet Boys?”
“Hmm, not a bad idea. I always kind of liked AJ, and Brian and Howie are cute, too…”
“CORINNE!”
“I’m just kidding. I’m not that drunk – at least not yet!” Corinne giggled, trying to ignore her friend’s concern.
“And what the hell happened to the top of your dress? Did Nick spill a drink on you?”
Corinne giggled again. “Not really. He startled me and I spilled it on me. He is really cute, isn’t he?”
“Corinne, are you out of your fucking mind?”
“Maybe. I’ve been the proper, reserved girlfriend for the past six months. Maybe I need to do something wild and crazy and not act my age.”
“That’s what you used to do.”
“I know, and that’s why I need to do it. Go back to my old, wild ways, at least for a day or two. You got me the room at the Marriott tonight. Maybe I need to share it with someone.” She raised her eyebrows lasciviously.
“God, Rini, you’re not 19 for Christ’s sakes! You’re 34 years old!”
“Hey, you didn’t need to remind me. I was having fun being in denial. Buzz kill.”
“I’m really worried about you. Talk to me, hun.”
Corinne shook her head, stubbornly. She was done with talking. It was time to get completely drunk and numb. “No. I’ve got to go. I have a date with another drink at the bar.” She got up and headed in that direction, wiping the tears away from her face. Talking about it meant crying and she told herself wasn’t going to do that tonight.
“Hey, Rini, I’m sorry…” Julia appeared behind her at the bar.
“No, I’m sorry.” Corinne turned to look at her good friend. “Jules, I promise I’ll talk to you later. Just give me one night of blissful ignorance before I go back to my old life of misery, okay?”
Julia smiled and hugged her. “OK. I’m sorry. I guess I’m way too overprotective, aren’t I?”
“Uh, yeah. But I love you anyway.” Corinne smiled.
“Me, too. Hey, I’ve gotta go. I’ll see you later. Just be safe.”
“Yeah, thanks.” Julia squeezed her friend’s hand and she was gone. She and Julia had been friends since they were in the 6th Grade. They looked out for one another. Julia was the serious, more responsible one and Corinne was often the crazy, irresponsible one and this time was no exception.
Corinne smiled as she ordered a shot of Tequila and downed it within seconds. She winced at the feeling of the burning liquid sliding down her throat.
It was had been years since she had had Tequila. Not since she was in college. She and Kevin usually drank beer or wine, not much of anything stronger. Kevin – she didn’t need to think about him right now. The next drink went down smoother and she felt that one throughout her entire body. She smiled at the bartender and she wondered if he knew she was willing to jump his bones at this exact moment. Jump behind the bar and do the deed with all these people watching if that’s what it took. What the hell, she was single now. Single. The word sounded so lonely.
Corinne was acutely aware that she had had enough to drink. Her head was spinning and her whole body was numb from the buzz that only alcohol could give a person. She really wanted to be in her hotel room screwing a guy at this moment, preferably Nick, but since that wasn’t an option, she found a spot in the far corner of the building and camped out there, fighting to stay awake or at least stay numb. The rest of the evening passed in a blur. Blah, blah, blah, award, clapping, people, laughter, talking, oh, God, I have a headache… Corinne thought. Would the evening ever end?
She was happy to see Nick accept his honor graciously and through alcohol-blurred eyes she smiled at him and was happy when his glance met hers. He nodded at her.
Finally the evening ended and Corinne was thankful that Julia was detained. She didn’t feel like talking to her about Kevin or talking to anyone about Kevin for that matter. She didn’t even want to even think about Kevin. Her headache was gone, but now her alcohol-numbed body just wanted to find a warm bed, whether a male shared it with her or not.
As Corinne made her way to the elevator, a man entered behind her. Without turning around, she knew instinctively who it was and her body quivered with anticipation.
